rollercoaster

Less than 24 hours after having written the last post about things I am thankful for we received some devastating news. We're in a bit of a state of limbo at the moment while we wait for the news to be confirmed or not but among the swirl of thoughts and emotions I have had, I've considered whether the list of things I am thankful for makes a difference. I think there will be points where nothing else matters but I do think these blessings will make a difference.

Thankful

So many things come to mind to be thankful for even just stuffed into the last couple days. We just finished the choir's last (and biggest) Christmas performance for this season and it went off quite well. Tied up in that is gratitude for music, Christmas, the friendships and community the choir has provided, and the opportunity to sing regularly and to play piano just as regularly. Then I spent over four hours yesterday catching up with a best friend and former roommate I haven't had a chance to talk to for several months. Not all the missed news was wonderful but the re-connecting was. Then I have an ultrasound scheduled for tomorrow so I am looking forward to seeing the new baby. Also connected to that I am so very very thankful that I have passed the sickness part of pregnancy and am feeling much better than I had ever given myself hope to believe was possible. Tied with that I was thankful I was feeling well enough that we were able to give the boys birthday parties no matter how small. And I am now getting more and more excited to be preparing for Christmas. I mentioned I'd like a wreath on the door this year and, a couple days ago, picked up a frame for one and some filler. When I got home from our dress rehearsal there was my wreath, hanging on the front door. It was put together more beautifully than I would have achieved. And that is tied to one of the huge over-arching reasons to be thankful: James is starting to be able to handle the effects of his concussion (or at least learning to recognize and work within its limits) and has managed to get a few things done around here (like the wreath) and has really put in a huge effort to stay calm and more positive and even help out! That sounds pretty pitiful but the debilitating effects reach into every corner of our life and overcoming even a part of them is a huge victory!